The first week of NaNoWriMo is over and I’ve made a lot of progress in terms of word count, but have been stuck in terms of plot.

Word count wise, I’ve written 13,070 words so far, making the Demon Book 43,964 words in total. However, I’m only on chapter seven and not even halfway through part one. So, this is going to be a fat book, haha.

Plotwise, I’m still stuck where I’ve been since October, Part One: Vasily. This started as one chapter broken into five sections, but each section ranged from 4000-7,000 words, so then they became chapters and it went from five to nine chapters. This section is giving me a lot of trouble and I think because it needs to do so much at once. It needs to introduce one of the main forces of the book: Vasily Karaminov, a child soldier turned spy turned priest turned most wanted man in the world. It needs to introduce the people who knew Vasily personally, who was affected by Vasily’s work, either as a spy or a priest, and the world Vasily helped create. It needs to introduce the antagonists and their twisted world view. It also needs to introduces a lot of the social, political, and religious set up of the region. And, finally, it establishes Vasily’s relationship with his LIs: Dmitri, who has so many secrets I can’t keep track of them all, and Sophia, a misplaced middle class white lady who is running from her family and homeland.

Troublesome MC – Sophia Henderson

Sophia is actually one of the books MCs and writing from her perspective has been really challenging. I normally don’t write from the POV of female identifying characters (except for my lesbian witch who came from a gangster family) and she is both a boring character but also surprisingly complicated, haha.

She comes from a middle class, white family who work in real estate. She is a Hevian from Heva, a colonial “democracy” that has colonized a third of the world. Her father is an abusive asshole who is invested in keeping the status quo while her mother tries to survive the asshole that is her father. She has six brothers, is the middle child, and the only girl. Because of this her father put her on display a lot and his friends, who never touched her, got very friendly as she became a teenager. Meanwhile, her father pressured her about marriage and having kids and she rebelled by having meaningless, sexual relationships with the dredge of the upper class. She went to college for an education and worked in her father’s real estate company, finding a way to escape by taking a job in the newly colonized city of Potushar in the Hcasza region.

Problem is that Potushar is being colonized by Heva’s neighbor: Gargain and they’re still working out several trade and land agreements. The Hevians have a bridgehead in Hcasza which they call New Bearcaska. The Gargainians have complete control over the northern city, Brost, and have even restored most of it’s railroad. Brost sits on border of Heva’s colonies in the Ignis Desert and the only way to connect New Bearcaska to Brost is through Potushar. Despite the Gargainian’s claims otherwise, Potushar is on the eve of full out revolt, led by people who survived several civil wars and warlords.

When Sophia arrives, she finds herself isolated and unwanted by the Gargainian officials who are trying to break the spirit of the people who called Potushar home. She finds herself drawn to non-Gargainians and quickly makes friends with the people most interested in seeing the Gargainians gone. This forces her to challenge many assumptions she has about the world, about Potushar and the Hcasza region, about her own country, Heva, and about herself. Heva is a multi-national, but segregated nation that tries to force Hevian as the only language spoken. Hcasza in general, and Potushar in particular, is a multi-national, multi-lingual, and multi-religious area, which makes Sophia uncomfortable at first. I’m having an interesting time exploring what that feels like for her and the things she has to work through to not be an ass like her father, especially since I’ve only experienced this a few times myself. It does allow me to slip in exposition without being too expositiony (hopefully).

Relationships are Hard

Funnily enough, Sophia’s own uncertainty about her place in Potushar and amongst her friends isn’t the biggest thing I’m struggling with. She is in a seven year relationship with Dmitri and develops a relationship with Vasily. The problem is that their relationships are just…well they’re so fucked up.

Because of her father and the bullshit expectations he put on her, she has complex feelings about relationship. I also think she’s is aro, which changes what she wants from relationships and can make them seem weird to non-aro people. Aro or aromantic means you feel little to no romantic attraction. I, myself, am aro-ace which means I feel little to no romantic or sexual attraction. It also means I struggle understanding what makes a relationship work and the difference between romantic and sexual attraction and what makes romantic feelings different from friendship feelings. Sophia has similar issues.

She met Dmitri first and was attracted to him during their first conversation because of his accent and because he is a charming person who thrives at making people feel special and wanted. They strike a friendship first, Dmitri feeling her out before introducing her to all of his friends and the important people of the city. They eventually strike up a sexual relationship that has its highs and lows and they break up now and then, but it’s the only consistent relationship either has. They are both poly and have multiple partners, Sophia striking a relationship with a journal editor and activist, Nadya, which ends up being a friends with benefits type deal. Dmitri, however, Dmitri becomes something different. However, neither partner is willing to admit it because they both have relationship issues.

They also both have communication issues because, while they like each other, they only share the bare minimum with each other. Dmitri has so many skeletons in his closet he needs a walk in and while Sophia’s secrets aren’t as many or as dangerous, she sees no need in filling Dmitri in on her history. And so they have a sexual relationship and close friendship while knowing nothing about each other. As the years past, they learn little things about each other, like Dmitri has a Gargoyle sister and grandmother and suffered during the various civil war, but that’s all Sophia really gets and she’s ok with it. She knows who Dmitri is now and she figures if it was important he’ll tell her when the time is right. She even asks him to move in with her and he agrees (that’s how she meets his Gargoyle family who also move in with her).

Then they meet Vasily and they’re both smitten. They both strike a sexual relationship with him and in the course of a month, Vasily becomes something different as well. Vasily who is tragic and shattered, but also charming and warm and gentle. Dmitri isn’t gentle. Dmitri is a wild ride or active live wire that can make you feel wanted and needed, but there’s also no rest, no moment for peace or quiet. Vasily, however, is quiet and comforting and knows how to make you feel safe, even though he, himself, isn’t safe. That dynamic works and it’s nice and in a city that is on the brink of war, it’s a relief and so Sophia doesn’t question it. Dmitri doesn’t question it.

Then the assassins come after Vasily and Sophia’s approach to relationships and her life is turned upside down. That’s the scene I’ve been stuck on. We’re both trying to figure out what she wants, why she’s with Dmitri, Vasily, and Nadya, and what she needs to know to decide if she wants to continue being with them.

Judging from her past relationships, I think she may be demiromantic, which means she only develops romantic feelings after developing a strong romantic connection with them. Apparently that took a few years for Dmitri and Nadya, but only a month for Vasily? I suppose that either means that Dmitri and Nadya have been good for her or that feelings aren’t predictable.

I feel that this relationship drama and exploration is really slowing down the plot, but it’s also important because Sophia’s relationship with both Vasily and Dmitri is one of the core relationships of the book and it’s allowing me to develop Sophia into a full-fleshed out, complex character, but I also just want to jump ahead to the assassins hunting them through the city, haha.

So, that’s how my NaNo is going. How is your NaNo going? What are some wins from your first week? What are some of the challenges you’ve encountered? Goals for this week?